I pen this today, hoping men will read this and take a moment to digest. I write, not to bash, abuse or disrespect the male gender, but to hopefully encourage and spark the God given gift in every man to be all God has for him to be.

I have been a faithful believer in the role and dynamic of the male in my life and in the lives of other women across this nation. I have never given up on the beauty of the male/female relationship, or the “power” this duo can bring to a world in need of love, guidance and leadership. I have been a wife, still mentoring a daughter, still encouraging sons, and have been in the “single” category for quite some time now. I have had conversations with men, listened to my daughter’s experiences and observed my sons as they grow as men. I have come to a chilling revelation…Men, have deferred their strength to women and handed us the leadership role more than we are graced for!

Yes, we women have been given an amazing gift of strength and endurance, a gift that can only be given to us by a God who loves us and believes in us. We should thank HIM daily for the grace and wisdom HE gives us for every situation that comes our way. The fact that we get through these situations without them actually destroying us, that is the miracle of being a woman! But the truth is so many young women and “seasoned” women are physically and mentally being attacked for lack of male leadership or spiritual covering by men. The bible says that we women are the weaker vessel, that doesn’t mean we have no purpose or value, and I am not here to debate equalization of men and women, this is from a God perspective. We are to be seen as one who needs to be secured, mentally and emotionally protected and valued as a gift. Eve was a gift to Adam, a gift to help him “take dominion” and multiply! We are very important to Gods plan.

Today there is an absence of male strength. I do not entirely blame the men, we wanted to prove we could do it just as well, they gave us the chance and now we are doing it for ourselves! Open your own door, walk yourself to the car, handle your own, now men let us do it ourselves! We baby our grown sons, enable them to depend on us just so we can feel needed… Not your sons place, he is not your Adam!  We pushed men away and now we are seeing we are not always wired to do it alone!

Physically and mentally we need that strong refuge. If we are not married, God is our husband, but if we want marriage, that man should be spiritually and mentally strong enough to extend that security. Through conversations and my own experiences, there is a shortage out there. Men spend more time primping then women. They have handed over the “uncomfortable” and “challenging” to their spouses or have decided to not entagle themselves in what they call “drama”, therefore never dating beyond hello. Life and what life has become is too much for many men and therefore women are doing it alone.